January 10, 2006

  • So, I'm going to New York Thursday morning to visit my Grandmother.  She is quite elderly, and just recently suffered a heart attack and a stroke.  I'm not sure which type of stroke, but the good news is that my Grandma is a hoss, and she is slowly but surely recovering.  My father just returned from spending a week up there visiting with her, and so now my mother and I will be there from Thursday through Monday.  Dear Whomever, please don't let Mario fuck up the house. 


    Anyway, I'm really excited to see my Grandma.  She's the quintessential grandmother.  Short, coifed hair, cute yankee accent, basement full of all sorts of crap she'll never need.  Like a dozen boxes of jello and two dozen cans of mushrooms.  Her basement is one of the only basements I've ever known, since we really don't have those here, what with the whole below sea level thing.  The room where I'll sleep is above the garage, and there is a crawl space attic with a bunch of games, including MOUSE TRAP!!  My sister and I always used to set it up and trap the mouse--I don't think we ever really played it.  Has anyone???


    Other reasons I'm excited: Can you say Saranac Black & Tan?  What about Loganberry syrup?  How about Dark Chocolate/Orange Sponge Candy?  Salin's Hot Dogs?  Okay, that last one is for a coworker, obviously, but I need to stock up on my yankee groceries.  We're bringing the King Cakes and returning with the beer and candy that quite literally make my world go 'round.  WARNING:  IF YOU SEE THEM IN MY HOUSE AND TOUCH THEM WITHOUT PERMISSION I WILL FUCKING CASTRATE YOU!  THIS IS SERIOUS SHIT!!


    Plus, I'll get to see other members of my father's family, whom I never get to see.  People like Bailey, my first cousin, once removed.  She is too cute:


     


    And I'll get to see some snow.  Maybe.  Get away from this 75 degree weather for a while.  Old Man Winter: I'm ready for ya!

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